Hello everyone! Thank you for being here. This is a transcript from my episode with Tamara Iglesias titled “Conscious Parenting with Tamara Iglesias of Wellynest.com”.
As you may notice, the transcripts are not accurate (I wish they were!) but I have no time to correct each of them because I’ve been really busy, I’ve been out there doing my Yoga Nidra class, helping women feel better, and sleep better every day! Now onto the transcript…
How Yoga Nidra Helps Transform Your Wellbeing and in Finding Consciousness
Episode Transcript:
[00:00:00] Lane: [00:00:00] All right. Welcome back. Hi guys. I hope you’re doing great today. I am really thrilled to be doing this series, and you know what? I just have to say, I’m really grateful that you come back and you listen. That you share, you spread this news, right? You spread the comments and the stories that I have to share.
[00:00:26] I really, really appreciate that. So thank you for being here with me and my guests. And today I am thrilled because this is a mini-series that I’m hosting right now, and it’s all about well, being more conscious. Right? Like I talk a lot about getting involved with or getting in touch with your intuition and about broadening your awareness.
[00:00:49] And today in this series, you know, we’re talking about consciousness and going beyond the mind. And my guest today is to merit Inglesias and she’s [00:01:00] the founder of welling nest. I met her, uh, in my yoga Ninja training. And it was just like a fast bond, like an instant. And she is a, um, like I said, she’s the founder of wiliness, which is a conscious parenting company dedicated to raising whole beings from the very beginning.
[00:01:19] So important. She coaches, moms and fathers alike, and Tamara helps empower families to live happy and nourished lives. Okay. Amen. To that. Uh, I think we’re on the same page with raising kiddos. And if you’ve been listening to me for a while or you’ve been following me for a while, you know that I have a nine year old and Tamara has a five and three-quarter little girl.
[00:01:43] And so we’re going to get into our show. Welcome to Mira. How are you?
[00:01:48] Tamara: [00:01:48] Thank you. I am. And wonderful in this moment. Yeah,
[00:01:56] Lane: [00:01:56] it is this moment. That’s all we have is the [00:02:00] moment. Uh, I get a lot of times, you know, what’s the difference between meditation and mindfulness? And it’s like, let’s just stay right here in this present moment.
[00:02:10] And then you have an opportunity to experience mindfulness. And they’re like, Oh, that’s it. Yeah. Let’s just keep it simple. Let’s just keep it simple, you know? So I want to hear, and I want our listeners to hear about you and your journey of finding this consciousness. And you in particular, you’ve gone into the parenting space and raising kids, but I want to hear a little bit of background story on how you have personally evolved into this, this greater consciousness like what’s happened here to you.
[00:02:45] Tamara: [00:02:45] Yeah, well, first I, I’ll share that. I think it’s a constant evolution. You know, there’s, there’s never arriving at a place. I will move past the limitation, move past an obstacle, heal a layer of myself, and I [00:03:00] get to a different operating system, a different way of existing with myself and other people in a different level of consciousness.
[00:03:08] Um, but I, I don’t. View this as ever, kind of getting fully somewhere, because the one thing I’ve learned in life is life is always going to be this wave. It’s always going to be ups and downs and. The more aware that I become, the more I’m able to have a almost neutral perspective to the highs and lows of life.
[00:03:32] And I think that’s been some of my greatest work is not letting those highs and lows take me on this massive wave. But instead, I get to ride the steady train of awareness, you know, self-awareness, healing, observation, all of these things that bring me back into my body. Bring me back into the present moment, which is so powerful and profound with our children, because we can easily get caught up in our triggers.
[00:03:57] We can easily get caught up in their [00:04:00] emotions and then our emotions roll right on top of theirs. And then we’ve got this like emotional storm happening and everyone is feeling disconnected and no one’s feelings are being honored and everyone’s nervous systems are like, you know, shooting into the sympathetic fight or flight situation and we’re just living in stress.
[00:04:18] So some of my biggest like conscious work has been how can I live in a way in my physical body to bring my stress levels down? So I have the greatest opportunity to tap into my intuition, to tap into my inner wisdom, to tap into my empathy and compassion for other people, and to tap into my compassion and empathy for myself.
[00:04:39] You know, if I’m not operating from a place of knowing and attempting and trying and living my life and kindness, and grace and gentleness to myself, then I can’t operate in that world to anyone else. Um, and I think that goes a really long way, you know, and there’s so many other layers to this, but [00:05:00] just that piece.
[00:05:02] Is a really big piece, and part of my consciousness journey has been, it’s just a healing journey for me. It’s been a healing journey. It’s been coming back to the remembrance of who I am, and it’s been coming back to wholeness. It’s been coming back to the knowing that I am this limitless. Um, abundant.
[00:05:19] Love filled being worthy of everything in this world. And I think we come into this world as that. And that’s my work as a conscious parenting coach, right? How do I support my mom is my Papa’s and my family’s to find this wholeness within themselves and cultivate this wholeness within their children.
[00:05:37] And in that self-awareness comes the opportunity for the greatest connection and bond we can have with not only our children, but ourselves.
[00:05:45] Lane: [00:05:45] So let’s back up because some. Of my listeners are like, what are they talking about? You know, like, you know, like I, I’ve had quite a journey of breakdowns and breakthroughs, and so like, how did you even [00:06:00] get on this kind of path, right?
[00:06:02] Like, what was that moment where you’re like, shit needs to change?
[00:06:07] Tamara: [00:06:07] Yeah. Um, for me it was at 19, I had lived on the outside, pretty shiny, awesome, you know, quote stereotypical like great life, you know, um, straight a student and popular girl in school, um, varsity athletes, scholarship to college, you know, went off to college.
[00:06:28] I got a scholarship to run. Um, rush, sororities got into whichever one I wanted, you know, like, um, had amazing friends, all of this goodness. While at the same time, during all of those years from 12 to 19, I was, um, suffering from a massive eating disorder and really big pain. And. Um, discomfort within myself and the way I was existing in the world.
[00:06:56] I think, and this comes back so much to [00:07:00] parenting too, is I’m a very sensitive being, and I don’t.
[00:07:10] And I don’t, I don’t have the most sensitive parents, which is totally okay. We don’t need to be like someone to honor someone. Nope. However, and again, why I now do this conscious parenting work is if someone had seen my sentence. Activity and had been able to cultivate that and honor that. I think I wouldn’t have had to suffer so much in my own isolation, in my own pain.
[00:07:36] Right? A lot of times, sensitive children are told that, you know, they’re dramatic. They’re too much. They’re making this, you know, and it’s just like, shut down, shut down, shut down. Um, and no blame. I love my parents. You know, I truly believe that every parent out there is doing the best they can with the tools they have.
[00:07:54] They have the same way I say our children are doing the best they can with the brain. They have the best, you know, from a [00:08:00] developmental stage, the best they can with the body they have that day, the best they can with the nourishment they have that day. Like all of these things matter. And so I was hurting, you know, there’s abuse cycle in my family.
[00:08:13] And, um. I think as a, you know, how deep we want to get. I think I, I think I stood up in my family lineage and was like, I’m here. I’m ready to heal this cycle of abuse. And the, one of the, um, results of that was an eating disorder because it was the only way I could control a lot of things in my life. And it all bursts.
[00:08:35] At 19 so here was in college, you know, I rushed sorority, lots of friends, varsity athlete, and I collapsed one day after race because I had my throat closed up and I couldn’t breathe. And I was taken to the school hospital and it came out that I had mano, but also the nurse like started seeing the flags.
[00:08:55] Like I had heart palpitations, I had blood, you know, coming [00:09:00] up like just all the signs and yeah. She basically was the one that helped me get help. And you know, they brought my parents in and it was a school decision, like, it’s not safe for you to continue at school. You need to go get help. Until, so the plug was pulled from my life, you know, this perfect life on the outside.
[00:09:19] And I had no choice but to look at everything in my life. And it was the biggest unraveling. And I had come. Two at that point, you know, at 19 what’s a baby? That’s a baby. Such a baby. So, so lucky. I know. I actually do view it as lucky. I really do. I mean, my spiritual journey started at 19 years old.
[00:09:43] Lane: [00:09:43] Incredible.
[00:09:45] Tamara: [00:09:45] Yeah. And it was kind of like a, do I want to live? Do I want to die? Do you know? And those are the cycles. Unfortunately, a lot of time in those eating disorder hospitals, you know, it can either be this awakening, like for me, it was an awakening and I was like, this is not my life. This is not why I was [00:10:00] put on this planet.
[00:10:00] I’m never coming back here. I am getting better. And like for me it was just an uphill, you know, like, yes, there were like little. You know, miss hubs, this, you know, two steps forward, one step back. But I was like, it was a massive awakening and shift in my life. And so many things came to the surface. A lot of us don’t get to know our wise.
[00:10:22] And I got to uncover so many whys through therapy and my clarity and direction of what I wanted to heal and how I wanted to shift happen. And I got better.
[00:10:34] Lane: [00:10:34] So amazing. I mean, it’s just everybody has a journey, right? And some people choose to get on it and some people don’t, or they get on it so late in life, you know?
[00:10:44] And it’s, it just shows me how the spirit is like, like, I’m not really in control here. Like there’s something else living through me, and maybe I’ll wake up or maybe not. And woke up. Right. Your spirit was like, I’m not [00:11:00] doing this.
[00:11:01] Tamara: [00:11:01] Yeah. So cool.
[00:11:02] Lane: [00:11:02] And then through, I mean, you mean that was, so how many years?
[00:11:06] That was a while ago. 20 years ago. Yeah. 20 years ago. Right. So you’ve had this like real deep journey of like self-awareness and E evolving, and we met each other at a training, like I mentioned. Uh. With yoga Neidra and I want to talk about yoga Neidra because it has been the most transformative tool that I have stumbled upon in my almost three decades of healing myself.
[00:11:40] And so how did you come about it? How did you stumble onto, right? Like how, how,
[00:11:46] Tamara: [00:11:46] yeah. Um, well, our teacher, Jana Roemer actually, um, a dear friend of mine and we met years ago when our babies, um, were very, [00:12:00] there. Very young. And I actually met Janice husband Mark when their boy, Freddie was just five months old.
[00:12:08] And we met in a like, cool, high vibe costume, coffee shop, you know, buttery brews and sugar-free, you know, refined for you muffins and all that stuff. We’re talking and he’s like, Oh my God, you have to meet my wife. She’s gonna love you. And so that was our first connection. And as a new mama hood, like we connected and you know, we adored each other.
[00:12:28] And then like. Life kind of took us our other ways. And then we came back and there was some mama coaching involved with me and her and. You know, she’ll always speak to how, um, that was such, you know, a pivotal aspect for her and her relationship with Freddie. And, um, I started diving into Janice’s teacher teachings and, um, you know, she’s so wise and has so many downloads and you know, astrology and you know, the [00:13:00] neuroscience world and yoga need Euro.
[00:13:01] And so I was following. Along and you know, starting to do it, but kind of not on the deepest level. And once I realized that Jana, his work and my work are actually so similar. So I am trying to consciously program the subconscious mind of young children and support the parents in the awareness of how to do that.
[00:13:26] And Jana is healing the adult population by helping them reprogram. Their subconscious minds. And basically what we’re doing is as adults, we are removing the limiting beliefs to step into liberating beliefs. And when that happens, the parent can come into wholeness and through the nervous system development, through brain development, through the way that the subconscious mind works, we can be programming our children and with these healing, liberating belief systems, instead of passing [00:14:00] down.
[00:14:00] And the generations of fears and insecurities and limiting beliefs and all the things that keep us trapped in our own, you know, own minds took on from our parents as a form of love. Like, mom, I love you so much. I’ll take on this pain, and it’s. It’s a subconscious thing, you know? It’s just the way it works. How Yoga Nidra Helps Transform Your Wellbeing and in Finding Consciousness
[00:14:20] I just love describing it in that way because, you know, nature and nurture, like we’re in that environment so much. Of course, we’re going to take on the patternings of our parents. You know, they’re, they’re mirror neurons. It takes on the pattern of those around us. We take on the belief systems of those around us, and it gets, yeah, at a young age.
[00:14:39] So Jen is healing. The adult population, and I are reprogramming the way parents step into Parenthood so that they understand it’s this massive healing journey of healing ourselves so that we can gift a different future to our children.
[00:14:53] Lane: [00:14:53] And do you, do you like get these mamas into yoga?
[00:14:57] Tamara: [00:14:57] Neidra. Oh yeah. I mean, [00:15:00] in my, so I’m right in the middle of my virtual conscious parenting course, or next week is going to be week six and it’s an eight-week program.
[00:15:06] So we’re actually nearing the end and in weeks one and two, part of their homework is Neidra. So in week one it was, um, Janice, Pisces season, which is all about the inner child because we were talking about conscious parenting, which is the awareness that it’s coming back to us. Most of these parenting issues come back to us.
[00:15:26] And when we have that awareness of like, wow, how am I not honoring me? What is my role in this? How have they not honored my inner child? Like where am I suffering from childhood wounds that I don’t even remember, but now they’re getting triggered through my child’s just normal child. Actions and reactions.
[00:15:45] Um, and then week two, I have them do the Gemini season one, which is all about cause week two is wholeness and, um, how to raise whole beings. And so if we aren’t whole, if we aren’t modeling wholeness, if we aren’t modeling self-care, if we aren’t [00:16:00] modeling how to downregulate our nervous system in trying situations, how can we ever expect our children to show up and do any of these things as well?
[00:16:08] We have to give them the tools through learning. You can just say it. Our children feel us way more than they hear us. You know, like they’re going to feel our energetic body. They’re going to see our actions in the world. They’re going to, you know, they hear our words, of course, but more so they’re listening to our words when we’re speaking to ourselves and other people than even them.
[00:16:28] Lane: [00:16:28] How Yoga Nidra Helps Transform Your Wellbeing and in Finding Consciousness And when they feel it right, they, they just like, there’s such. The feeling beings when they’re so young, you know, like an appearance, like we walk into the room and the whole everything can change, right? And they’re like, Whoa, what’s happening? So it’s so good that you’re giving that gift to them, to the mamas so they can start changing their whole energy. How Yoga Nidra Helps Transform Your Wellbeing and in Finding Consciousness
[00:16:49] How often are you meditating?
[00:16:52] Tamara: [00:16:52] For me, I have a daily practice. What’s it look like? Uh, right now, um, my June [00:17:00] 1st on a daily meditation practice, I do. So I do Kundalini a lot. That’s a big part of my practice as well. Um, so I’m doing, um, a bunch of Korea’s, um, my current meditation. It’s. You know, I start with a little mantra, move into cat cow.
[00:17:16] I’m doing, um, ego Eradicator. I’m doing the addiction meditation and the abundance meditation, um, as my kind of set right now for June that I’ve been working on. And I have a yoga teaching practice. Um, I attempt daily yoga nature practice. It’s more multiple times a week. I give myself Monday nights.
[00:17:40] Live with Jana here in LA. Um, yesterday morning I did a yoga nature practice, and then it was, um, not the day before, but the day before that I did an evening. Yoga needs your practice. So I’m probably doing Neidra now about three to five times a week.
[00:17:55] Lane: [00:17:55] Um,
[00:17:57] Tamara: [00:17:57] yeah, if not more sometimes, you know, and I’ll [00:18:00] wake up and I’ll need, like right now, the Gemini season one is only 30 minutes and amazing.
[00:18:04] So if I wake up and I’m off, I’m like, Neidra Neidra. 10 10 times to drop into me. So
[00:18:12] Lane: [00:18:12] you know, a lot of, uh, I mean women are listening to this show, right? And moms and single ladies as well, but I, I want to hear from you if you could give, like a lot of them are super busy, right? So how do you carve out that time to put in practice?
[00:18:29] I like, cause I have like, my practice is almost two hours a day and you know like I’m up at five 15 in the morning. So I’m carving out my time because I know that if I don’t have that, forget it. So how, you know, let’s give some practical tips on like, how are you carving out time.
[00:18:48] Tamara: [00:18:48] I think the first thing is having realistic expectations, like getting your foot, your toe wet.
[00:18:56] No, like I think if we were to say to someone like create two [00:19:00] hours for a meditation practice, they’d be like, no way. Like. So far away from their correct quality has to be something that can work into their world. How Yoga Nidra Helps Transform Your Wellbeing and in Finding Consciousness Like for me, years ago when I first started doing like a daily practice in Korea is like my daily practice was six minutes.
[00:19:18] It was like two, three-minute meditations, but I needed to be in that space for an extended period of time just to know that, Hey, I can show up for myself for 60 minutes a day. Literally, even if you’re starting with every day, you take three long, slow, deep breaths, no matter what throughout the day like that, I feel like is accessible to everyone, and it may seem silly to like the deep meditators out there and everything, but everyone has to start somewhere.
[00:19:46] Yeah, that’s where I started years ago. It was like two to three-minute meditations. That’s where I started and I did that for like a year and a half or more, almost two years. And I did other things on top [00:20:00] of that, but that was like every day I’m doing this for myself. And that was my self care meditation practice.
[00:20:06] As I ease into this like daily ritual of loving myself and you know, obviously now I love myself much. You no longer on on many days, but I’m a single working mama. Like sometimes for I to be like, Oh this 15-minute meditation it can feel and then need. You’re on top of that. Right. But what I’ll say is the people that say, I have no time for that.
[00:20:30] Those are the people that need it the most.
[00:20:31] Lane: [00:20:31] So true.
[00:20:35] Tamara: [00:20:35] Cause if you can’t carve out. Three long slow, deep breaths or three minutes like something’s off in your world. You know, cause think about it. I mean, even one hour a day, what percentage of that? That’s like 6% of the day. Like if you’re not investing 6% of your day in, you.
[00:20:54] There’s something off there, and obviously we could probably change these numbers to waking hours, but [00:21:00] still it feels like if we’re the most important part of our operating system and our world, like what percentage should you be investing in yourself?
[00:21:09] Lane: [00:21:09] Okay. I love this idea right here. I’m just, I’m taking my note here 6% of the day.
[00:21:14] Like, invest in yourself for six. Like that’s like minimum, right? Like, Oh my God. But I like this idea of two, two, three minutes. Meditations as well, and it can be that simple. I love, that’s a juicy, juicy,
[00:21:31] Tamara: [00:21:31] or even just three long, slow, deep breaths. Yeah. We’ll sit in stillness for two minutes for three minutes.
[00:21:37] Just sit without an agenda, without a to-do list, and yes, your mind’s going to run. That’s the way like meditation works, but just, yeah. Stopping for a moment, like there are some days where I’m like, Whoa, I have not slowed hours sick and I am going to breathe. It’s fine by center because anything I [00:22:00] do from an aligned.
[00:22:01] The centered calm self is going to be that much more productive than running for radically chasing my day. And I think the difference is when you have some sort of practice, some sort of breath practice, meditation, practice, yoga, practice awareness, practice, whatever feels good and juicy to you. You get to be the one leading your world leaders versus chasing it.
[00:22:28] Lane: [00:22:28] Yeah. Forget chasing it
[00:22:30] Tamara: [00:22:30] and there’s a totally different energy. There’s always trying to catch up.
[00:22:35] Lane: [00:22:35] Oh my God, Tamara, that’s so good. Yeah. I never want to chase again like that. I know for. That is done no more. I love that. So I hope you guys are hearing that no more chasing.
[00:22:49] Tamara: [00:22:49] Um, okay,
[00:22:51] Lane: [00:22:51] so where, okay, so let’s see.
[00:22:54] Do you have any kind of goodies that you want to share with the audience or want to send them somewhere? Uh, so they [00:23:00] can check you out even more?
[00:23:02] Tamara: [00:23:02] Yeah. Yeah. So come, I mean, I have a. Um, I’m finally getting to the social media game. So I’m on Instagram and I really try, I’ve been really investing in time to give some juicy content.
[00:23:16] I’ve tons of conscious parenting tips and, um, shifts and how to remove guilt and shame from parenting and the job and language tools around not using the word no and what you can do instead. And you know, I’m just, every week I’m giving. Tidbits there, you know? So come join me on the Instagram community. How Yoga Nidra Helps Transform Your Wellbeing and in Finding Consciousness
[00:23:36] All of my work can be found@wiliness.com um, my next virtual conscious parenting course the end of September. How Yoga Nidra Helps Transform Your Wellbeing and in Finding Consciousness So the super early bird pricing is up for that. We’re private all my services, it’s just all on willingness.com. W E L L Y. N E S t.com and yeah, I love engaging with people that are wanting [00:24:00] to make these shifts and changes, and I make myself available as possible while still honoring me and my daughter and my day. How Yoga Nidra Helps Transform Your Wellbeing and in Finding Consciousness
[00:24:09] Lane: [00:24:09] So important. I just think the work that you’re doing is, it’s Epic, right? Because I really believe that we’re at a place right now of. If shit doesn’t change, we’re going dark right. And so we have to think about the kids. You know, the generations that are coming up behind us and really changing all the mindsets, right?
[00:24:30] We’re really changing the energetic fields, like really looking at things differently. So I’m so grateful that you do the work that you do. It’s like, huh, thank you. Um. Thank you for being on the show with me today and spending some time and talking about yoga Nidra and about the work that you do in the world and about making a shift, you know, making a decision to make a shift.
[00:24:55] Thanks for being with me.
[00:24:57] Tamara: [00:24:57] Thank you for having me. [00:25:00]