Boobies Vs. Smiles?

I am not one of those women with big ta-tas, as a young girl I was totally flat chested, and dreamed of having a bigger chest.  I would stuff my bra almost daily and hoped that a magic potion would be developed for us small chested girls.  Well, you know that never happened.  My bra cup is typical, I’m a 36B, I am not complaining about my the size of my chest.  Wait.  Why am I talking about this?  Ok, let me get to the point. I am bringing this up because I use to get totally annoyed that the girls with big boobies got all the attention.  They would end up with the popular boys, they would get the promotions, they would get taken to the front of the lines… and so on, you know what I’m talking about, right?  

Well fast forward to now, where are those big boobies?  I’m just gonna say it, they are sagging.  HA.  That is a joke I hope you got it.  No seriously, are those women still depending on their chest for attention?  I have been thinking about this a lot lately.  Recently I was in the airport watching a lady who happened to be well, let’s just say bountiful on the top side.  As I watched her move about in the airport she never smiled.  She never looked kind, or nice, or like she was interested in life.  She was angry, or perhaps just having a miserable day, I don’t know.  As I watched her I started thinking about women in general and how we live in the world, and what we need to do to survive and get ahead in life.  

I have known a lot of “dancers” in my time, and have fantasized on how “great” that job would be, work a few hours, do a little “shaky shaky” and make big money, seems easy.  HA, yes I said I was fantasizing. 

The dancers I know with the big ta-tas work hard, and play hard.  Obviously it’s different from the work that I do, but none the less it’s work.  Using your body to make money is work.  As an ex-model, I do know this, I know how daunting it can be day after day relying on your body and looks to survive. What happens when that same lady begins to age?  In my case I started coaching women on days I had noting booked.  I also learned another skill, I became a Pilates instructor, opened a studio and had famous people as clients (high maintenance!).  Now here’s a can a worms that I could open and talk about…whoa, movie stars and age, sagging, weight, “No one will want me…”  That could be an endless conversation.  I will save that for another post.    

Back to my thinking about how we women use what we can to survive and thrive in today’s world.  I like this idea of using what we can, I like it because we all have different bodies, we have different minds, we have different personalities, and not all of us can smile and get our way with a  wink. 

(perhaps this little one can get away with it...)

(perhaps this little one can get away with it…)

Not all of us have the big boobies and are going to get what we want with a little shaky shaky.  No.  

I have had to learn how to be authentic, (not easy) and just as important I have had to learn how to be 100% present with people.  I find that other people around me will recognize when I am completely there with them.  It makes all the difference!  My smile I have had to change, I now use my eyes to connect with people.  I use my voice, and sometimes I use determination and laughter.  I haven’t wanted to use my body to make money in five years, since my son was born, I can’t imagine that work anymore.  I’ve changed and I’m grateful. 

I was recently talking with a young lady and asked her what her skill set was and sadly enough she didn’t really have such a set, I was shocked.  I sat and listened to her, she wrote down a couple of things (baking, painting, watching children, all great skill!) and then looked at me and said, “That’s about it”.  She’s a pretty girl and has assets, yes, boobies.  It’s hard these days to work, and get by in society I see women every day struggling, I hear them every day trying to get above the hustle and barely surviving.  I suddenly realized that in today’s world, which in my little humble pie opinion, boobies, smiles, eyes, words, everything we’ve got is key! 

I mean seriously, we women make an average $0.77 on the dollar in the workplace compared to our counterparts…  If we decide to create a company we are often denied for funding when we pitch to VCs and we are barely taken seriously when we have some life changing topic to discuss.  

I know that men pay attention to us when they want to, or when they need something… But more importantly, ladies, we have to rise up and start supporting each other in all areas!  Let us celebrate the women who are flat chested and smile, let us celebrate the big ta-tas, let us join together and become stronger, let us show ourselves.  Together we can stand up to become more straightforward. 

Boobies vs. a smile?  Which wins?  Neither.  I think I want to celebrate and lift up the boobies, lift up the smiles, life up women, say yes to us women, and let it all lead the way.  

Until next time.  

Hugs, N Cheerios.

PS.  DID you sign up for the Challenge?  Don’t miss it.  Let’s change some things.