I have been thinking quite a bit about keeping things in order, which includes my brain! It can become very busy up there, and I don’t like that. I like it when I’m free, and I can think clearly. In order for me to think clearly I have learned that there are a few things that I have to maintain in my life.
One of them is HONESTY.
For the next 30 days I am going to confess One thing to you. One thing that is happening with me. It might be good, terribly bad, or some sneaky secret. I’m not sure. I’m doing this because as the holidays approach my mind becomes a dangerous field and I don’t want to find myself making poor decisions, like walking out of a store with an extra book and telling myself it’s ok… Yep, I’ve done that. (And yes, I went back and paid for it, but so embarrassing.)
When I was growing up I was sent to church. We had to go through confession, I didn’t like it. Who does? The thought of going into that little closet kind of freaked me out, seriously. (Still does.) I think there’s something about confession, it’s good for the soul.
A couple of days ago I was peaking into someone’s online life. I was in total awwwww, and I became envious. She lives on the other side of the world, a tropical location, works her own hours, looks great in a bikini, enjoys mojitos, & eats fresh mangos everyday, she has well, a visually stunning life. I dug around her site and thought to myself, “What the F*ck? How come I’m not living there… Why don’t I do XYZ… blah blah blah!” My mini monologue ended abruptly when I realized what I was doing, I was comparing myself to someone else’s images.
I have to say that being able to halt those deadly remarks is liberating. I used to hear them 24 hours a day about everything, and everyone, thank god that is done. Over the years I’ve learned how to be honest with myself and where I’m at, not an easy task. Seriously, who wants to be honest with themselves all the time? It’s quite nice to live in oblivion and escape reality. I think it’s easier to live in total denial, but after awhile it becomes painful. Brutal honestly trumps oblivion every time now!
The idea of a daily confession this holiday season will bring me one step closer to being true to myself and those around me. I hope you will join me on this mini quest for the next 30 days!
Day One– I confess to comparing myself to some woman on the other side of the world, wow!
What is your confession?! Share it.